When the worst thing possible has happened to you, all you can think about is undoing it.
Taking it all back. Refusing to accept reality. Not believing in what’s just happened.
If you just think long enough and hard enough, maybe you can undo what’s been done.
You spend hours, days, raging inside your head. Replaying events. Reassuring yourself that what happened was wrong and shouldn’t have happened.
It doesn’t work.
All it does is destroy your peace. It keeps you hidden in the dark. You can’t see what to do next if you haven’t accepted where you are.
Michael Singer suggests a radical approach in his book The Surrender Experiment.
He suggests accepting EVERYTHING that happens to you.
Surrender to it. Make peace with it. Let go of the resistance to a life you didn’t choose, a life that doesn’t match up with your expectations or desires.
When you surrender to what is, you discover a peace of mind that helps you see new opportunities, new options, new courses of action.
Maybe if you just did this. Or that. Or this other thing. Maybe it would move you forward. Maybe it would change something.
But those insights can only come to you if you’re not fighting reality. If you’re not resisting what is.
Facing reality is hard. Accepting it is even harder. But those steps are necessary if you want to arrive at a new beginning.